And so I hardly have time for myself

I really thought third year was busiest year we'd ever have.

owh no. i was wrong.

Fourth year is the SHIT.

the shit. i swear.

I'm in uni every weekday. 9 to 5 is pretty normal nowadays.

I'm always high on adrenaline due to my busy schedule that's why sometimes I don't stop working til when it's my time to go to sleep. thankfully, I'm not insomniac.

I have 6 modules in total this semester. on top of that, I have a whole year project going on, and also presentations and coursework due.

I am trying to keep myself up-to-date with all the lectures, so I revise on daily basis.

and when you think weekend is for me to get a good rest, oh no no. u got that wrong.

weekend is netball time. we have 4 hours of training every weekend. but when it comes to netball, i don't really complain coz i enjoy every minute of it.

newsflash, my team won our first gold medal at Dublin Games! that was my first gold medal after playing on the same team for the past four years. Alhamdulillah.

on a lighter note, last weekend was a short getaway. We went to Dublin and I instantly fell in love with the city. Irish people are amazingly nice and GOOD-LOOKING TOO. Had a great bonding time with my teammates, and I just realised how close we've become. I think since we had new players coming in last year, the team became more lively and close. good times!

so we conquered Dublin. our biggest game of the year, Nottingham Games is in 2 weeks time. I'm sooooo excited for this! since we enjoyed our bonding time so much, we decided to drive down to Nottingham and stay for a night there. hope Nott Games will be another success. Amin.

owh I kinda got a job offer here. when I said "kinda", it means i got the job provided that I get my visa sorted first. well, UK government's being a pain in the ass with the new policy. so will see how it goes.

*LOVES*

Manchester and 4th year

been wanting to update my blog long before i board the plane back to manchester but unfortunately been quite busy until now.

so I arrived in Manchester on the 14th.

unpacked my boxes and luggages the day after.

had a small bbq with the MSSM committee on 16th.

went down to London for Nadia's birthday on the 17th and stayed there til 20th morning.

London was good. I loved the weather. then came back to gloomy Manchester.

Fourth year just started 4 days ago.

and i am so looking forward to the pile of work that I will have to do all year round.

owh.. i'm staying with Kaizan and Francesca in a private student accommodation. our apartment is pretty cosy and my room is as big as my room in Malaysia. or maybe bigger. pretty cool. been buying some stuff to decorate my room so that it's not too empty.

I miss my family, friends and cats and I probably had the worst homesick recently (coz I never had homesick). I have to blame this on my niece coz i miss her the most. argh.

life in Manchester ain't too bad. but i can't help feeling a bit empty without Nadia around. i went to London and for the first time in 2 years I didn't stay at Aina's. my God. i swear it's such a big adjustment for me. but i think i'm adjusting well. I haven't shed a tear yet (I tried) so I think I'm OK.

i'm also scared for fourth year. I have a project which consists of researching etc and it's a whole year thing. I want to get first class for my MPharm degree but it means giving up my social life. gah.

Applying for work is a bitch too coz i'm a friggin international student and you British peeps don't wanna hire ME!

I JUST REALISED THIS IS A DEPRESSING POST. LOL.

Sorry guys!

Clock is ticking

Time can really take you by surprise.
I just realised that I have about 3 weeks more until I go back to good ol Manchy. and i think 3 months in Malaysia has made me miss Manchester, like a lot.

In my previous posts, I was probably dreading the fact that going back to the UK this time will be different. I don't know whether it is going to be worse or better. but i'm optimistic that my final year in uni will end with fireworks. it will. i will make it happen. well.. ok not the fireworks.
but i will make sure that i enjoy my final year.

afterall, i'm still not sure whether i will be staying UK for pre-registration year or not. so it could be my final year in the UK as well. which got me thinking on how to get rid of my ridiculously large amount of clothing.

owh well. three weeks. i shall spend it wisely. i know staying at home seems unproductive, but i really do love staying at home. i enjoy taking care of my niece and annoy my family members with my never-ending rambles. so yes, next week will be raya. i can't believe puasa is ending so soon. but i can't wait to get fat during raya.
wheehoooooo.

it's been an awesome holiday at home. i'm blessed.

*loves*

Riots and break ups

Facebook is actually like watching daily news on TV3.

i get the latest news from there. don't have to go on TV3 or BBC no more.

latest currently is the crazy riots caused by chavs in UK. Chavs are also known as the British mat rempits, only that they don't ride motorbikes unlike the rempits here and they're like at the lowest level in the British social class. they're poor and mostly are unemployed (unlike rempits here there are a few quite well off).

well, I am quite confused how this has been going on, and it's spreading throughout UK like wild fire. you guys should go on BBC. some of the rioters were interviewed and omg. you can't believe how stupid they are. and coming from ppl from a developed country, really? some of them said they joined the riot to show off to the rich ppl that they can do anything they want. some wanna proof a point to the police. and some said they join for the sake of getting free stuff. omg. how stupid can these people be? makes me feel even prouder to be a Malaysian. i think even uneducated Malaysians are way more civilised.

anyways, enough about riots. another thing that i came across on my fb newsfeed is... a lesbian couple broke up and they really really have no shame in publicising their frustration with each other. and i was like WHATTTTT????? i swear my newsfeed was flooded by their nasty statuses and wall posts. please. this does not only go to a lesbian couple. to all the couples in the world. please, if you break up, there's no need to publicise EXCESSIVELY. we get your point. you broke up. you're devastated. publicise it once on fb and THAT'S IT. there's no point prolonging the publicity. in the end of the day, you're only gonna push your ex away and the probability for you to reconcile is 0.

HAIHHHH... anyways, it's puasa month. we should be doing good, rather than shit. i tell that a lot to myself. i'm not the best of the best Muslims, but there are times when I have to know when to draw a line. cross the line, a hell to pay.

It's August and this means Ramadhan!

HAPPY FASTING IN THE MONTH OF RAMADAN AL MUBARAK, MY FRIENDS!

July just ended, and now we're starting August! which means, i have about 6 weeks til I come back to good ol' Manchester. I still haven't bought my tickets though. the initial plan was to come back early and do a short trip to Turkey (visiting my ancestors, as they said), however, I checked the flight tickets went up to 200 pounds and so i think we will have to postpone it, won't we? so now I'm contemplating whether to go back on the 14th Sept or maybe later on say.. 20th? I will have to pick a date where I have my friends flying with me, or else I would die of boredom. I used to have Aina everytime I fly back or from UK. haih.. kena cari flying buddy baru laa cam ni.

last week was a great fun. my good friends, Syamsuddin a.k.a Sudu is back from Egypt and Nina is back from Indonesia. was great to finally see them.. after what? a year? damn. anyways, these ppl go way back when I was in SMSJ. whenever i come back to Malaysia, i always make it a point to spend as much time as i can with them. not only Nina and Sudu, the usual ppl are me, Maliq, Shera, Jaja, Azzy, Nina, Al and Batch. i've met up with all of them except Batch, whom I'm expecting to come from JB soon or I will very very upset if I don't get to see her before i fly back to UK.

owh what else is new? yes, my infamous partner-in-crime/ex-flatmate, Nadia Anwar Tan is back in Malaysia and I was touched that I was the first person she called up when she's back. that's coz she needed an instant bitching session. bless her. and yet, she had to ditch me on Sunday afternoon for her grandma. I shall have to forgive her for that.

apart from going out with friends and taking care of my niece, I have just started on reading Harry Potter series, and God knows how many times have I done this. revisiting Hogwarts, ppl. within 4 days, I finished the first 3 books. i love the feeling of getting sucked into the book.

that's it for now. I wish everyone a blessful Ramadan! a reminder to myself and my readers, pls avoid committing sins, and do more good in this month!

We grow up.. a bit too fast! nooooooooooooooooo

this month, i saw the pics and statuses of my dear friends who graduated.

CONGRATULATIONS!

sadly, that also marks the end of their uni life, which means some of them are leaving me!!

Nadia Anwar Tan and Tan Shang Neng.
both of them are leaving me for London to do their BAR. sad.

Aina Sakina and Hazim Abd Rahman left UK for good.
started working already.

and many others have left Manchester and UK for good. only the 4 ppl above i will really feel their absence when i start my final year in Sept.
i know i won't be alone in Manchester, coz i still have my other friends, but these ppl really were a big part of my uni life. and now. they're gone. aiyooo.
ok emo post. sorry.

the thing is, time flies a bit too fast. if i were to graduate this month, I would have graduated with BSc Pharmaceutical Science degree. but what the heck, that degree would only allow me to work in pharmaceutical companies. so another year I will have to go through to become a qualified pharmacist.

I am currently applying for pre registration trainee pharmacist job in UK, which will commence after my graduation next year. i really want to work in the UK, and my dream would be to work in a hospital. unfortunately, it is very competitive and difficult to get that job. so i am also applying to community pharmacies. to be honest, i didn't enjoy working in a community pharmacy as much as i did in hospital pharmacy. Community is a bit too monotonous. soooo.. we'll see. worst case scenario, i might just come back to Malaysia for good coz i will be guaranteed a job in Malaysia anyway. i actually have 2 options, provided that i get atleast one offer from one of the pharmacies i applied to.

u see, 5 years ago, i was in KTJ, not sure of my career path.
4 years ago i was in Cambridge, decided to pursue Pharmacy.
3 years ago, i started MPharm degree in Manchester.
and now, i've started applying for jobs.
next year Insya Allah, i will be a graduate and start my career as a pharmacist.

damnn that was a long way, but felt like it happened too fast.

Silence speaks louder than words

is it really?

we live in a community that talks. gossips. bitch.
heck. i do all that too. but not unnecessarily. or maybe that's how i wanna justify this disgusting behaviour. i do try to abstain. FAIL. it is disgusting really, especially when one thing leads to another. words traveling from mouth to mouth, and when it comes back to me, it sounds similar, but not exactly the same as the source. even worse, may sound totally different!

that's when I learned that we can never trust 100% what people say until you hear from the direct source. words can be twisted, changed etc til the whole thing became different to its original.

people find it thrilling to find out about new gossips. gossips coming from people's response. but what if a person refuse to respond and keep quiet about a situation? now, that is when speculations come out. people speculate, and sometimes make that person look bad for me, there are just some things that i chose not to publicise. why?
1. coz i don't care
2. coz it's insignificant
3. to avoid unnecessary drama

apparently number 3 can't be applied no more coz when ur silent, ur actually creating drama. well life's tough nowadays so you have to deal with it.

so what if shit comes out due to your silence? you have options
1. u can blog, twit and update ur fb status and pour ur heart out
2. brush it off like an annoying fly and don't do any sort of public response

From my past experiences, this is what I learned and I think I should share with my readers.
Silence is actually a key to a peaceful mind. when you're quiet, it means you know you're right and you have nothing to proof to the world. When you're silent, does not mean you bottle up your negative feelings or whatsoever, but instead you look at that shit in the most pitiful way, brush it off and move on with your life. When you're silent, it means you're indifferent. Afterall, the opposite of love is not hate, but it's indifference. coward not to defend self? nah. why defend yourself when you know those were just gossips. and people who are smart enough should atleast find out the two sides of a story. as long as you and people close to you know the truth behind it all, then there is nothing to fear. you know who you are, what you have done and what have you not, and that is all that matters.
On top of that, when you're silent, you know you're the bigger and better person.

*loves*